Drunk Detective Naegi
by Ptroxsora
Summary: When the survivors have a party at the Flamingo Hotel's pool and Hagakure loose his stuff, detective Naegi is on the case! But can he really find a missing item when he's drunk? First game spoilers and absolute crack lie ahead.


**So, uh, you can blame Rooster Teeth for this one. It was inspired by Drunk Detective Miles, so I'm sure you've already guessed that this is going to be a crackfic. Please enjoy. Oh, and there are some spoilers for the first game, not that anyone cares.**

Makoto Naegi and Kyouko Kirigiri had been dating since they had gotten out of Hope's Peak Academy. Naegi wasn't really sure what happened, it was probably because of how much they bonded during all the investigations and back when she went down in the garbage to save him. Aoi Asahina had determined that they needed to have a party to celebrate the fifth anniversary of their escape and after god knows how much pestering, she was able to coax Byakuya Togami into getting the six of them rooms at the Flamingo Hotel in Las Vegas.

Naegi pulled open the door to his and Kirigiri's room. It was rather plain, a flat screen TV was placed on one wall with a mini fridge and dresser under it. A single king sized bed was facing the TV and on the right side of the TV was a desk with two chairs by it. A balcony observing the city was on the back wall of the room. Once he got further into the room, Naegi noticed that a painting of a bowl of fruit was hung over the bed. Kirigiri pulled her suitcase into the room looking over it.

"Hmm, not bad," she observed, coming to a stop.

"Yeah, it's pretty nice," Naegi agreed. The detective gave a short nod.

"We should probably unpack and head down to the pool- Asahina-san said that's where we should meet up," Kirigiri said, placing her suitcase on the bed's neat white sheets.

The two quickly unpacked, changing into their swimsuits. As Naegi had finished putting on some board shorts, he waited for Kirigiri to finish getting her swimsuit on. He flicked through channels on the TV, not that he could really understand them well.

"Are you ready?" Kirigiri asked, drawing Naegi's attention to her. Honestly, Naegi was speechless. He had seen Kirigiri in a swimsuit before, but seeing her in that dark purple bikini still stunned him. He noted that she still had on a pair of gloves, he vaguely remembered her telling them that they were waterproofed.

Naegi quickly shook himself out of his trance. "Yeah! Let's go!"

Grabbing some towels from their bathroom, the two headed down to the pool on the first floor. Surprisingly, it was almost empty. Other than the four other former Super High School Levels, the two were alone.

"Naegi-kun! Kirigiri-san!" Asahina greeted warmly from the pool as the two claimed some beach chairs next to each other.

Yasuhiro Hagakure was in the pool with Asahina and Naegi could instantly tell that he had already had a lot to drink. To his mild surprise, Touko Fukawa and Togami were sitting together in the hot tub, Togami's arm wrapped around Fukawa while the literary girl seemed more than happy about this. Seeing beers by the two, Naegi knew exactly what happened.

Hagakure said something that Naegi could barely understand, but after sometime he realized that the fortune teller had said, "If ya got anything to put away, we got a locker."

Kirigiri strode up to him and took the locker's key, going off to place her bag in there. She then returned and ordered a beer along with Naegi. As time went on, the two began to get extremely drunk, but no one there could have been as drunk as Hagakure.

Hagakure stumbled out of the water to where Asahina, Fukawa and Togami were having a conversation. Naegi was unable to hear the conversation, but he could tell that Togami was irritated by the fortune teller's arrival. Before anyone could react, Hagakure collapsed, clearly unconscious.

Unbeknownst to most of them, someone had went to the locker to get something out of it, putting Hagakure's green sports bag on the floor to reach it. The person them walked off, leaving the bag that contained Hagakure's wallet, iPhone and a large amount of money.

Somebody eventually took Hagakure back to his room, and after that we all began to leave. Asahina, Kirigiri and Naegi were the last ones there. After Kirigiri was able to escape from Asahina, the two left the pool. As Naegi grabbed Kirigiri's bag from the locker, he remembered seeing a green sports bag on the ground near the locker.

_Oh, man, Somebody left their bag_, Naegi thought as he walked right by it, having no idea that it belonged to Hagakure.

"I feel sick." Kirigiri moaned as they entered their room.

"Go get some rest," Naegi slurred.

Kirigiri did as he suggested, collapsing onto the bed. Noticing his phone's screen was glowing on the dresser, Naegi went over to it, seeing he had a message from Togami.

_I think that Hagakure might have had a bag. He keeps asking where his stuff is_. The text read.

Remembering the bag he saw, Naegi thought, _I'm on the case!_

Telling Kirigiri that he was going to go look for the bag, he left the room, getting on the elevator to look for the bag. It was only on the elevator that Naegi realized something very important.

He was also very drunk.

He stumbled out of the elevator and to the pool. Seeing that the bag was not there, he began searching the lobby. Somehow, he ended up at a pizza stand.

"Hi sir, would you like anything to eat?" a man behind the counter asked.

Deciding that eating might help clear his mind, Naegi bought a slice of pepperoni pizza before continuing on in his search.

Finally making his way to lost and found, Naegi walked up to the counter. A man who couldn't have been older than him sat at the counter, playing Pokémon X on his 3DS. Between bites of his pizza, Naegi said, "Hey, my friend lost his bag, it had a wallet and an iPhone in it."

As he was drunk, Naegi dit quite realize that this wasn't the right thing to say. The guy behind the counter glanced up at Naegi before going back to his game.

"Ha! Yeah, I'll look for that," he replied.

Naegi's face paled. _Oh, crap! That's not a good sign!_

**Aaaaaaaaaand, that's it. If you want to add more to this, go ahead, just credit me for the idea.**


End file.
